Saturday, January 10, 2009


Dear Dazzy,

I have thousands of things to say and every time I sit down at the computer, I hesitate to start., because I just know it will be the world's longest post...

My Dad is gravely ill.
It's the beginning of the end. Not pretty at all.

Kids are soon back to college-and once again I will be in a very, very quiet house.

I still need to loose twenty pounds. LOL

I find dimes when I need 'em, weird signs from you here and there, and I am 3 months away from two years-TWO YEARS-that count from the last day you took a breath as my amazing Daz.

I'd call it the January blues, but I am not in a funk at all-quite the opposite, really, for the most part-I am taking care of house stuff, car stuff, parent stuff, life stuff-with a minimum of fanfare.

Hmmm...but there IS the largest moon of the year tonight-and full moons are so beautiful...

"It will appear about 14 percent bigger in our sky and 30 percent brighter than some other
full moons during 2009, according to NASA."

So I am off to go look at the moon, like you and I did all those years ago on a night that also held a full moon-foolish romantics, LOL, both gazing at the only thing in the night sky that was a constant on our repective sides of the Earth. Space geeks at heart, you and I :)

Words don't usually fail to form in my brain, but tonight it's all about emotion, and the embrace of the full moon. Here's my new fave song by the Black Ghosts-appropriately called Full Moon.

The lyrics move me to tears, because they speak to my emotional state right now-

When the thorn bush turns white that's when I'll come home
I am going out to see what I can sow
And I don't know where I'll go
And I don't know what I'll see
But I'll try not to bring it back home with me

Like the morning sun your eyes will follow me
As you watch me wander, curse the powers that be
Cause all I want is here and now but its already been and gone
Our intentions always last that bit too long

Far far away, no voices sounding, no one around me and
you're still there
Far far away, no choices passing, no time confounds me

and you're still there

In the full moon's light I listen to the stream
And in between the silence hear you calling me
But I don't know where I am and I don't trust who I've been

And If I come home how will I ever leave ?

Love you Dazzy. Always.

Kisses, Wifey.

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